[This is a letter I wrote to a friend, after she sent me a (gentle) reprimand for challenging a friend of hers on Facebook. She informed me that she was a "Staunch Republican", and said that she didn't like politics, but that she didn't want me to insult her friends. I care about her, and I put considerable effort into composing this response.]
Firstly, let me say what I would have
said before, if your friend's comments had not intervened: I am very
happy for you and your daughter, that she was able to witness such a
historic event (I don't believe we've ever even had five presidents
ALIVE at the same time before, let alone all collected in one place),
and I also congratulate you on her brilliant blossoming! You must be
so very proud... as I am of my son.
Regarding the rest, I am not sure you
DO entirely appreciate my heart and sentiments. I am sure that you
can understand what it is to be passionately committed-- and I am
certainly aware that you have a heart and brain! I too, was raised
Republican-- though I didn't learn what that meant, till I was an
adult. It was quite a shock for me to discover that the party of my
parents (or rather, my father's party; my mom became quite liberal
after she got away from him) was diametrically opposed to practically
everything I believed in! Since then, I have voted with my heart
and mind-- and increasingly, as the years have passed, I have found
it necessary to investigate the sources of statements that are
presented to me as truth.
Increasingly, the wealthy and powerful
in this country, particularly the corporations, have been able to
manipulate the media, to purchase our lawmakers, deceive the people,
and to literally mold the country to suit themselves. Their
intentions have nothing to do with honor, and everything to do with
profit, and control-- whatever they may say. Surely you must be
aware that Fox News, for example, does not have a sterling
reputation for truthfulness? That's money and power talking!
I understand that you have
worked for many years in a highly conservative, largely male
environment-- and since you were also raised Republican, there has
probably never been much incentive for you to question your core
beliefs. Such things do deeply influence us.
I am also sure that there is much to
admire in your law-enforcement friends. There used to be much to
admire in the Republican party, as well. It is NOT what it was. The
Republican party that your father, and my father, were raised with,
was much more aligned with the beliefs of mainstream Americans; at
one time, to be Conservative really did mean, to be conservative.
Cautious. Thrifty. Traditional.
But it doesn't mean that anymore. When
you tell me that you are a "Staunch Republican", you are
telling me that you ally yourself with the party of Big Oil, of
global warming denial, the party that is STILL fighting tooth and
nail to deny women the right to control their health, and their
bodies, and their right to not be raped. You have allied yourself
with the party that thinks gay and lesbian couples aren't as human
and worthy as the rest of us... the party that STILL hopes to deny me
my first chance ever to have health-care... the party that just
deep-sixed the President's gun regulation agenda. The party that
wants to teach creationism, take away the last safety-nets for the
poor, the unemployed, the elderly, and the disabled, to persecute
undocumented immigrants... and make sure my vote doesn't count. (oh,
and if you question the accuracy of any of the above, let me know--
I'll be happy to look up the sources and send them to you).
Can you see why I might find your
allegiance difficult to accept? I don't know what your personal
beliefs are... but when you support the Republican party, you support
all these things. From my point of view, you might as well have
said, "I'm rooting for Darth Vader and the Evil Empire-- but
it's just politics. Let's get beyond that, shall we?
I don't want to fight with you, or with anyone. The other night, when I sent that message to you, a
surge of adrenaline went through me that kept me awake all night.
It's SCARY for me, to tell people where I stand, and what I
believe... possibly because it wasn't safe for me to do that, growing
up. But more and more, I am finding that I MUST speak. I CANNOT
stand by, and watch what is happening, and say nothing. I also hate
talking about politics. But if I keep my mouth shut, when someone
makes a racist or sexist or hate-filled remark, how will anything
ever change?
Your friend's remark was so incredibly
unfair, too. He reminded me of the bully in elementary school (I
don't know if you experienced this, but I certainly did) who
repeatedly punches you with your own arm, all the while chanting,
"Stop hitting yourself! Why are you hitting yourself?".
Obama isn't ineffectual. He's been very effectively blocked in
almost every action he's attempted-- by the most consistent,
concerted Republican
effort this country has ever seen. Surely you and your friend are
aware of that?
So where are we now? I'm not sure.
Certainly I will always love and care about you, always wish you
well. But your politics are so repellent to me that I must admit, it
makes me very uncomfortable. I know you to be a kind and honorable
and loving person, a devoted parent... so how can you support such
appalling causes? I have a couple other friends and relatives who
fall into this category... and I find, frankly, that it makes me want
to avoid them.
I don't want to avoid you. But I do
have one request: when you hear things on the news, or from your
friends, could you PLEASE question the source?! Since you've been
an investigator, you already know how to do that. It's not hard to
find out the truth about things... if you look for information from
sources that are actually reputable.
Fox News is not; neither is CNN, nor the Heritage Foundation, or a
slew of other propaganda machines... most of them right-wing, and
funded by right-wing oil money. (I'm not saying there aren't foul,
lying, mercenary Democrats; there most certainly are... and I LOATHE
them. But they're working for the same people as the Republican
ones.) For myself, when I really question something, I frequently
look it up on Snopes.com. They have no axe to grind... I highly
recommend them.
I know you didn't want to hear all this
from me... and frankly, I didn't want to have to say it. But if the
alternative is for me to be silent, or to lie... well, I just can't
do that. Not anymore.
Love,
Holly
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